Chronicle of Important Events


04/13/99 The Day of Pain: Ian's Shoulder Pops

By Punkin


It was a sunny (though somewhat windy) day on Carleton campus. A bunch

of aphrodites had gathered for an innocent game of football a short jaunt

away from the recreation centre. No one had any idea of the horrors to

come.....

Basically, After throwing the game winning (aka. games only) touchdown,

Punkin pinned the ball for Eli to kick. He booted a huge kickoff into the

oposing teams endzone. Ian, being the only memeber of the team brave enough

to return the kick against monsters such as Luanne and Tracy, snagged the

ball out of the air and headed towards the pack.

He started right, saw no hole, and so cut left. Dodging one would -be-

tackler he looked up. Right into the eyes of Punkin. It was obvious to

all that Ian was frightened. He tried to cut once again to the right but

Punkin was too quick.

Ian, brave as he was, was struck down in his tracks by an amazing

suplex-tackle that stunned the crowd.

A horrific scream eminating from the depths of our brave friend could be

heard by all as his shoulder was jarred from its socket.

Ian lay still on the ground as Punkin turned to see what had happened to

his friend.

Luckily, Steph, wearing a lifeguard shirt (and therefore qualified to

guard lives) came to the rescue. Without hesitation she knelt down beside

our dying friend to help.

"Get some Ice!" she yelled as the rest stood around in a stupor. "This

man has a dislocated shoulder!" Setting his shoulder back into place, and

making a cast out of mud and grass, she healed his wound as if by magic.

Thanks to our hero, Ian is still alive today.

Epilogue:


Punkin (real name not given) went on to become a great facil for

engfrosh 99. Though he has never enjoyed a tackle so much since that day.

Ian also went on to be a great facil for engfrosh 99. He is still

haunted by the events of that fateful day.

Steph also went on to become a great facil for engfrosh 99. She was

head of the first ever engfrosh first aid team.

All three dissapeared after a very long night of drinking and have never

been heard from again. It has been said they have retreated to a mystical

"temple" where wine is free. But that has yet to be proven.


04/13/99 Picnic In The Quad

Hello,

Some of you actually graced us with your presence for our aphrodisiac

picnic. The others just wimped out. Yes, you have exams, and yes you had

no way there. Our smart ass has an exam tomorrow and one the next day and

still came for a little bit on her rollerblades. Tracy showed up for the

picnic and a little bit of the fun and then also left.

We all met at the Mechanzie quad and ate the interesting food. The tuna

macaroni salad, the nanimo bars, the egg sandwiches, the cookies, the

chacolate cake that feel on the ground and was picked up. WE still ate the

bit that I didn't drop on the road. We saw dinosaurs, and planes and even

flying saucers.

We later crossed over the locks and had a few games in ultimate and

football and played some games with some dogs who thought that they could

help.

I hope the rest of you had a good day without us. Andrew, I cryed that you

didn't come. But I do hope that your hand feel better.

Steph